22 January 2012

And Then There Were Two

Today is Two's birthday.  His birthday is twelve days after Three's, even though I only managed to get around to writing about Three last Wednesday. One holds the title for Most Dramatic Birth, but Two gets an Honorable Mention.

As I stated in the previous post, Macy's conducts its annual inventory in January. I was 37 weeks pregnant when they took the count. There was a blizzard approaching our area, so there was some concern that the drop in barometric pressure would trigger labor. The Captain was stuck in New York when the weather came, but my brother was living with us at the time. He had a big ass truck, (not as fancy as the one he just bought--I have total truck envy) and the hospital was literally two minutes from our house, so I felt confident we could make it. I crossed my legs and prayed. It worked. Two stayed put, and the Captain made it through inventory.

My sister Kate was home at the time, staying with my mother. She was visiting us on the twenty-second, and we talked about going to the mall. I was at the point where I wanted to walk the baby out of me. We got busy doing other things, and the day slipped away. She left around 7:00, and made me promise I wouldn't go to the mall alone. Well...

So I went to the mall to look at birth announcements in a card store. I squatted down to reach the lowest shelf, and Two curled up against my spine and kicked me with all his might, like a cop busting down a perp's door. My water broke.

Holy shit!

Thankfully, the store was right near an escalator, and my car was parked just outside the doors. I moved as quickly as a could, given the fact that I was 39 weeks pregnant and leaking. I got in my Volkswagen Fox and headed home. Volkswagen no longer sells the Fox in America, and for good reason. It was a no-frills, manual everything, four-speed shift sedan. And I hesitate to say sedan. But it was safe. Because that is always the Captain's priority.




 I got in my German tank and drove. I was already having contractions, which made it difficult to shift gears on the manual transmission. The mall is eight minutes from my house. When I got to the traffic light outside my town, my contractions were already less than five minutes apart.

Holy shit!

I didn't have a cell phone in 1996, so there was no way to alert the Captain. I flung open the front door and found him in his flannels, setting up our VCR to record "Murder One," a thoroughly entertaining show that lost its way after Season Two.

"What's going on, " he asked.

"I'm having the baby," I answered.

"What do you mean, you're having the baby?"

"I'm in labor, and he's coming fast. Meet me in the bathroom with a towel and the phone!"

I called my obstetrician, a new guy that I didn't really like, and gave him the particulars. He was very sanguine about the whole affair.

"But your last birth took ten hours."

"Yes. But this is different."

"Well head over to hospital, and I'll get there as soon as I can."

I beat him there. When the nurses checked me in, I asked one of them if I could have anything for the pain. She looked at me with her beautiful hazel eyes, and said, "Honey, you're having the baby." They started looking around the ward to see if a doctor was available. My original OB was waiting on one of her patients, so she came to coach me. If I'd only pushed a little sooner, she would have been the one to catch Two. But dammit, my doctor arrived and took over. (I did get to switch back to her for all subsequent births, however, so yay!)

Two arrived in this world 159 minutes after my water broke in the Hallmark Store. He weighed seven pounds, fourteen ounces, five pounds of which was cranium. We called him Anvil Head. The whole experience left me feeling super-powerful, like I could accomplish anything.

Which is probably how we ended up with Three.

This is what the Captain and I commonly refer to as our "first family." One, Three, and Two.



Followed four years later by our "second family," Five and Four.


This concludes a year of recounting the births of the pack. Tomorrow I celebrate one year of writing The Lone Woman Diaries. Thank you for sharing it with me!


21 comments:

  1. I love Three's expression. It's like he's keeping a secret from the other two.

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    1. And it looks to me like Two is saying, "Hmmm, so I'm going to be stuck with these guys for the rest of my life, huh?"

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    2. Janet23.1.12

      Another thing about Three's expression, Carrie. It is exactly like looking at a miniature Face-of-the-Captain, photoshopped onto the body of a tiny baby. Megan's DNA runs strongly through the features of the Five Boys. But Three has always been "Little Captain" in my mind.

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  2. Thank you SO much for sharing your life and boys and writing and house and weather and family and everything else with US!

    Happy Happy to Terrific Two!
    Julie

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    1. And thank YOU for being the first non-related person to find me!

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    2. I have to clarify and say that I consider June and Janet to be my relatives. But I looked back, and I think Lora may have commented first! I give you the credit, though, because you had been trying (unsucessfully) to comment for days, so I think you may have been reading along anyway!

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  3. Janet22.1.12

    Happy Birthday, Two! Great post, Megan. I love the pictures. I actually own the first one, but I don't think I've ever seen Four and Five in the Toy Tub. And Holy shit, indeed, at five minutes apart at a traffic light!

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    1. Well, as you know, I was always trying to outperform Patricia.

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  4. Wow! I think I had repressed most of those details. Great pictures, by the way.

    Happy Anniversary!! I can't believe it has only been a year with the Lone Woman. What did we read before that? Thanks so much for all of the fabulous posts.

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    1. I'm pretty sure you read LucyMarch.com.I think you get to share some of the credit for getting me started down this path!

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  5. Oh the cute cuteness! Love it, esp Four and Five in the red bucket.

    And I *adore* the lone woman diaries. Adore.

    And happy bday to two.

    PS I graduated high school in 96.

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    1. Thanks for the adoration! Your graduation date makes me feel old.

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  6. Awesome story. Love the photos.
    Happy birthday, Two!

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    1. I told Two he could read the story if he wanted, and he said, "Yeah, maybe," with typical teenager disinterest. I supppose it will take a few more years for him to fully appreciate my awesomeness.

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  7. Look how gorgeous they all are! Those are great pictures. Happy Birthday, Two!

    (And happy early blogoversary.)

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    1. They were, indeed, adorable babies, and are now fine-looking young men who tower over me. Time passes quickly.

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  8. I love the birthing stories even though I think I was "in on" all of them in some way. But my aging brain forgets details - like I don't remember that car at all. As I told Two on his birthday, it is easy for me to remember them at certain ages especially like the one in the photo. Loved that red hair. He is a work in progress and I love the job you and The Captain are doing. I know he will be a man you will be proud of. Congratulations love on the year of blogging. Now stop reading and work on the book. It's been a great year of reading for me. Thank you.

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  9. Well Megan I knew you didn't do anything half way! You lead such an exciting life...

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    1. Exciting is a nice way to look at it!

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  10. It's freaking me out to see actual pics of them. Happy birthday!

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    1. Photographic evidence that there are indeed five of them! Of course, all the pictures are from when I used to be able to pick them up. Alas, no more.

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Thanks for reading! Unlike other Diaries, this one isn't private. Feel free to share your thoughts. Politely, of course.